Why you should NEVER work too hard for someone else's company
Do you work waaaay too hard for someone else’s company?
Most of us have done it.
Maybe you’re doing it now.
I remember a rainy weekend in London.
I’d just started seeing a girl.
The weekend before, I’d gone a bit hard at the pub,
wrecked our plans to catch up
and felt sorry for myself most of the week.
I declared valiantly I’d keep it chill for this Friday, planning to meet up with her at my place after she’d gone out with her friends.
I was going to go home early!
By the time Friday arrived, I’d had another looong week at work.
One of my clients was a whinger, but her Dad was the ultimate punish.
I remember putting him on loudspeaker to the open-plan office…
With my workmates lip-syncing back to me ‘W.T.F.’ in unison.
They were one of the OG clients for our business and there was some perceived sentimental value in putting up with them.
One might call it the ‘Jerk Pass’.
I was the chill Aussie Project Manager who could handle it.
Until I burnt out. But that’s another story.
So, back to this fruity tale…
I get to the end of Friday.
I was exhausted and stinging for a beer.
Know that point where you say, ‘funk it’?
So, I went to the local pub and decided I’d have one,
maybe two, with the intention of heading home…
And of course, those frosty cold beers were going down like a treat,
combined with the general fatigue from work
it was easy to say yes to the next one.
And the next and then one of my mates I hadn’t seen for a while rolls in and next minute I’m skipping between nightclubs having the best time ever and I get the call…
She was outside my house and I wasn’t there.
Luckily, I’d shown her how to break in.
So she was safe to get inside, albeit awkward to vault through the window.
Then I lied and said I was at the fruit shop down the road.
The fruit shop in North London…
I was headed to a South London nightclub.
She got inside and went to sleep.
I didn’t make it home till sunrise the next day.
I wrecked the weekend and it was most likely one of the anti-pillars of why that relationship fell apart.
It’s a curious equation:
Working too hard + No Drinking System = Rocky relationships.
What I discovered is you might not be able to stop ‘working too hard’ straight away but if you change your drinking strategy (most people don’t have one to begin with) you can navigate work and the fallout from it with a clearer head.
And then it doesn’t screw with your relationships as much.
I found when I had a drinking system, it wasn’t perfect to begin with and it’s still being optimised, but it made a massive change.
There are many out there now.
Dry January is one of them.
If it hasn’t worked for you or even if it has,
I’d suggest finding a system for February.
As Habit Lord James Clear says, ‘fall in love with systems.’
‘Goals can provide direction and even push you forward in the short-term, but eventually, a well-designed system will always win.’
Gotta love a good system!
If you’re curious about the one I’ve been refining with a community of folks dedicated to better habits and relationships — check out The Token Game.
